Uncomfortable
It’s the second time I’ve watched a schism unfold in real time. It’s very consuming mentally and emotionally. Some have chosen paths opposite to mine and it makes me question myself, why am I not doing the same?
No definite answers so far but I believe in my heart of hearts that I’m not coming from a place of moral superiority. I don’t think I’m better than anyone because I’m most definitely not.
Difference in values and tolerances feels closer to the mark. Even if there were shared values, the relative importance — the rank — we give to these values seem to be causing so much conflict.
I’m so bothered. Uncertainty is so uncomfortable.
Beautiful day to be out at the back lakes. Just heard thunder though and Mr. Weather (my husband) is already thinking of heading back.
Small dahlia ’Irish D Porter’, big dahlia ’Winkie Cinnamon’.
Cosmos ‘Rubenza’ starts off cranberry red and softens to a dusty peach. I first heard of this variety from Arthur Parkinson – or maybe it was Sarah Raven? Can’t remember now but I’m so in love with it. It has an earthy feel to it that’s not as airy fairy as other cosmos cultivars.
I keep having these mild moments of panic that the patch is so patchy… and then I realise it’s still January. Good grief, Brian, settle down mate!
There is a biggish poop pile near row 4 of the back dahlia patch. I don’t know if (don’t think) it’s possum poo because it’s just not that vibe. I think wombat.
And I don’t want to be the one get rid of it. Good luck to me and my flower farmer dreams 😅
There was a bunch of kids who thundered past where we were sitting for breakfast. It was a tight arrangement and the floorboards were rickety, our table lopsided – my coffee definitely spilled a bit. The mum felt so embarrassed and mouthed ‘sorry’ to me.
I said to her, ‘Oh I understand completely and can totally relate! You’re fine!'
And then she said, ‘I feel quite brave taking them out by myself.'
To which I replied, ‘It is absolutely a brave thing to do. Go you!'
She left laughing, with a wave goodbye. It’s so nice to have these types of interactions.
Want to read: Monsters by Claire Dederer 📚
I’m feeling motivated to read this soon. But I’m avoiding because I’ll be frustrated if I don’t get a clear way forward.
No pressure, Claire 😅
Becoming a Bridge Person in Precarious Times - Seventh Wave
Feeling joy in times of distress and heightened precarity does not mean we do not empathize, grieve or care about our own suffering or those suffering around us. One of the harmful tendencies I most despise in social justice spaces is the compulsion to be outwardly morose, grave, or enraged all the time to show how committed we are to our values. Even as this myth is being dispelled, the endless mainstream news cycle of panic amps up our anxiety and pushes us backward away from joy.