A pause and a breath.
When the three factors-concentration, mindfulness and equanimity are present, the operating mode of the mind shifts significantly. The mind becomes more buoyant, less “stuck” on an experience, and more adept at shifting attention from moment to moment. In addition, the mind is more tranquil and workable, more disciplined, more capable of seeing events without the burden of self-centeredness.
from The Comparing Mind
Broken streak
It’s really trivial but my exercise streak is no more and I’m sad about it. I had the weirdest day yesterday — head spinning, throbbing, nausea, felt clammy — so had no choice but to hide in the bedroom with all the blinds drawn. The whole day was spent horizontal and it seems I really needed it.
Today is much better but I don’t feel ready to resume the same level of activity yet. I want to highlight that this is me, listening to my body, practicing self-compassion and reminding myself that broken streaks can be mended*. I can bounce back. I’ve done it before and I can do it again.
I wish my inner critics from the past, all a little out of date and unaware of the newer and kinder and more capable version of myself, sit and watch for a change. Not be too loud for a change.
From previous excavations, I know I can’t banish these parts of me. I also don’t want to.
It’s a bright, grey day. Diffused light always makes me feel like my edges are blurred.
*Can I please get a point for self-compassion? Is my Apple Watch keeping track?
But when it comes to addressing the problems we face, no amount of posting or passive info consumption is going to substitute the hard, unsexy work of organizing.
Organising is hard because it requires vulnerability and openness as well as non-attachment to outcomes.
I have to start thinking about autumn jobs, dahlia jobs (it’s its own category), and garden finance jobs. I overspent last spring and I really do not want a repeat of that. I’m hoping it proves to be a limitation that inspires creativity as well as honesty in terms of what I have capacity to grow.
A skipper feeding on verbena bonariensis nectar. I love this plant – it’s proving popular with the blue banded bees too.
A bucket of blooms for friends and teachers 🌸🌱
Something about raindrops on flowers.
Dahlia ‘Christie Leader’ 🌸
Today, I sold my first ever bucket of homegrown, kind to earth flowers (dahlias and celosias) to a local florist 🥳
I’m feeling giddy and like an imposter at the same time. Why are inner critics such spoil sports.
I really want to paint again. So many internal dialogue but’s already.
Finished reading: The Thursday Murder Club by Richard Osman 📚
⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️
So very delightful. I laughed out loud many, many times (to the concern of my family).